Dear Mom: Thank you for all the things you never gave me

In 2016 I wrote this piece for the Huffington Post and upon reflection it still says everything I want to say…

Mother’s Day means many things to many people and as the debate regarding everything from the commercialization of motherhood to the truth as I see it that we have tried to capture one day in order to honor a person who means so much to so many around the clock…With no real opportunity to resign her position- still does not take away from the love and joy that is shared between mother and child.


Mother's Day
The lady who taught so many things about life and continues to do so

Happy Mother’s Day Mom !

My mother is remarkable. I wish I had the space to go into detail, but few women rival her compassion or ferocious commitment to protect her children. So at nearly 47 years old, I would like to take what some might deem as an alternative approach to recognizing my special lady as I reflect upon all the things my mother never gave me…

  1. My mother never gave me reason to believe that I couldn’t be anything I wanted to be.
  2. My mother never gave me permission to hurt others for personal gain.
  3. My mother never gave me false hope.
  4. My mother never gave me anything less than 100% of herself.
  5. My mother never gave me a reason to doubt her love for me.
  6. My mother never gave me the illusion that she was the perfect parent or had all the answers.
  7. My mother never gave me her opinion unless I came looking for it.
  8. My mother never gave me a misguided belief about the fact that some people may not like me simply because of who I chose to love.
  9. My mother never gave me her friendship until I earned it and was old enough to process it appropriately.
  10. My mother never gave me anything more than I needed to find my own way in the world.
  11. My mother never gave me an ultimatum that would force me to undermine my own sense of self.

My mother never gave me so many things and by doing so she helped me discover who I am and where I fit into the world.

Thank you mom and on your day know you are joyful noise in my life each and every day !



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