Let me begin by saying this post is meant to be funny. If you don’t think it is please let me know as my mom thinks I am hilarious! Please also note while I wish I did not need to say this the world is a perfectly imperfect place so please note I am neither making fun of motherhood, pregnancy or being gay. In defense, I marvel at the magical world of birth and am slightly jealous I can only be a supporter and not a participant in the event. Each night I pray for ovaries and the like and alas I am still blessed with all my “man parts”.
Every girl needs her gay and I am just that! So with so many marvelous lady friends taking this journey with child I have had the joy of tagging along for the ride and have learned a few things I wanted to share. In my opinion the best part of list is YOU can add to it so be respectful but HAVE FUN and please do build this list with me
10. There is no Stork its sperm and egg. 9. Prada does not make diapers. 8. Prada should make diapers. 7. Pregnant women don't care that YOU feel bloated. 6. A baby bump is not a 70's dance. 5. Your pregnant friends ALWAYS look beautiful (even when they don't). 4. Breast feeding is natural it is not a fetish. 3. Baby poop smells like the souls of the undead. 2. Giving birth hurts more than anything you have ever experienced so don't even try to make a comparison. 1. The vagina is not the enemy.